Written by: Jenny Diehl
Dedicated wife and mommy of two. Loving daughter. Driven co-worker. A loyal friend. These are all adjectives used by my friends and family to describe me; but what you might not guess about me, is that I am a former IV crystal meth addict. Just four (almost) short years ago, I literally had nothing. I had no family (or so I thought), no friends (actual friends who cared about my well-being), no job, no money, no personal belongings, and no future.
I grew up an only child, in a loving home with two parents who just celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary. I was an academic letter recipient in high school, a varsity track runner, performed in various shows and was a nationally-ranked competitive dancer. Sometimes I sit and think about what caused my “wild-streak”, and I have yet to answer that question.
When I moved to Dallas for college, I was alone and I was free to do whatever I wanted. I was a 19-year-old kid in a big city and the possibilities were endless. I started staying out all night, drinking, partying and not going home to my empty apartment. Maybe I covered up my homesickness with booze. There was no doubt I liked to have fun, and it was just a matter of time before I took my first ecstasy pill.
I guess some college kids can pop a couple of pills on the weekends, and then return to their responsibilities on Monday, but I learned very quickly that I wasn’t capable of doing that. I started losing interest in my schoolwork and other activities I was involved in, and when my parents found out what I had been up to, they brought me home.
"Drugs will change you from the inside out, but what is incredible, is that so will God; and he did."
At that point, I didn’t realize my addiction was a serious problem. It wasn’t long until I was back out partying and making friends with the people who had connections to drugs. Meth was my drug of choice, but I was down for pretty much anything. By this time, my family didn’t recognize the person they raised and I had pushed everyone away. I felt alone, unworthy, and unwanted. I had tried many times to get clean, and each time I failed. Drugs will change you from the inside out, but what is incredible, is that so will God; and he did.
I met my husband during our active addiction, and a few months later, we got clean. I decided to go to treatment on September 30, 2012, and by late December, we were expecting a baby. There was no turning back to my old ways. I was now responsible for another life, he deserved the best life I could possibly give to him.
God knew what I needed before I did. He gave me my son so he could change me back to the person I had turned away from. People think addicts are just low-class, second-rate citizens, who are bad people doing bad things; but that’s not always the case. Drugs don’t discriminate, they can reach the poor, the rich, the city or the suburbs, and they don’t care who you are or where you come from. Addicts can be your neighbor, your best friend, your daughter, your child, or your role model; and they can turn those good-hearted people into people you don’t recognize.
Luckily for me, I was able to take back control of my life through God and the help and support of my family. Certain people will tell you that addiction is a disease for which there is no cure, but there’s no way I believe that. There is a cure. There is hope. I found my hope for a better life through my son and my husband, who were sent to me by Jesus Christ to save my life.
We have been freed from our addiction. My thoughts, actions, and daily life priorities don’t include using, or even thoughts of using. My loyalties lie in my relationship with God, my children and family, and my career, and in a world full of temptations, I’d say that’s nothing short of a miracle.