Written by: Brooke
So, I don't know about you, but my life is as imperfect as it gets and completely nuts most of the time! If you have it all together? A heartfelt congratulations and please tell me your secret! Because I sure don't.
I work. I'm a mom of two. My husband travels quite a bit for his job, so most of the time, I'm running the show by myself. I don't just want to find the balance. I need to find it. The balance and the calm.
Launching this website has been such an exciting adventure. Jenny and I have poured our hearts and souls into it. We've put ourselves 'out there', hoping to connect with others to let them know they're not alone in their struggles. We're so grateful for the platform. We're grateful it's working. But, even with all of that GOOD stuff, we both still battle with 'finding the balance'.
One day we have it. One day we don't.
Jenny has written about her Anxiety disorder. So many of you have connected with her on that. I'm one of those people. I deal with the exact same thing, too. Mine kicked in after I had children. I'm a very overprotective mom who thinks of every angle how something can go totally wrong. I Google and WebMD WAYYYY more than i should. My babies are my world and it's my job to protect them. I'm trying my best not to screw them up!
I have the stress of many roles and there are days I fully embrace that, and other days I just want to hide in my pantry and cry my eyes out. I realize I can't do that (all of the time), so to quote Dory, I 'just keep swimming...'
I don't want anyone to look at me and think I am feeling sorry for myself because I don't for one second. But, I... we... need to decompress and just be adults for a moment. A little 'me' time. I feel guilty for wanting that sometimes.
Times like that, I consciously talk to myself and tell myself to take deep breaths and enjoy the moment.
Before the launch of sheKC, I was lucky enough to work for a good friend of mine, Jon McGraw, who launched a company called Vision Pursue. He has no idea I'm writing this blog and I'm not being paid a cent to say any of this. But, I love what it's all about. Vision Pursue is an app that teaches mindfulness. How to be fully present in the moment and content with where you are in that moment. To be totally honest with you - that is SO freaking hard for me! Like a lot of busy women, I'm always thinking 18 steps ahead of everything... what needs to be done... dishes, laundry, kids, baths...
I often think of Vision Pursue and I'm not kidding the calmest feeling comes over my body (obviously, I need to think about it more often!) When I was doing mindfulness training and mindfulness meditation I felt SO. MUCH. BETTER. I felt like accomplished more, I was more present, I enjoyed more 'moments'.
I need to get back that.
I know that I'm in a season of life right now with really little kids and a start-up business. Life won't always be quite this hectic (I think...) But, as I get older, I see that with each new stage comes new challenges.
It's finding the balance, always.